Monday, October 01, 2012

Monday Morning Irritation

Question: What was the last thing that irritated you?
Answer: 14 year-old Male


Synopsis: Boy hurts foot at skate park late Sunday evening. He calls the tricks he does (attempts to do) fun and challenging I call them dangerous and suicidal. I do not always enjoy being right... and this is why:

Monday morning (7:05 am) boy (who usually walks himself to school) limps theatrically into my room as I'm blow drying my hair and getting ready for work. "I can't walk."
"I'm sorry." I said genuinely empathetic.
"Go get ready for school. I will come back (instead of going strait to work) to get you after I take your brother (across town in morning commute traffic) and I'll drive you to school."

"But, I can't walk."

"But you are going to have to try, because you are not going to miss school."
Ten minutes later I head out the door. "I'm leaving, I'll be back as soon as I can."

45 minutes later (8:00am, school starts at 8:15) I come back to the house, open the front door and boy is sitting on the couch. In his pajamas. Eating Cheerios strait from the box.

My head nearly exploded. Why it is not socially acceptable to drink at 8:00 am when you are raising teenagers is beyond me.

"What are you doing? Why aren't you dressed?"

"I told you I can't walk."

I stared at him, eyes narrowed and jaw clenched. A temporary calmness came over me, one that has saved this boy's life many times in his short existence. I swallowed (almost choking) a deep breath, looked at the ceiling and willed some extra patience to find its way into my person.

"You managed to walk out here to the living room, you managed to walk to the kitchen and back for some cereal, you knew I was coming back here to pick you up... WHY, in all that is good and Holy, did you not get dressed?

"Why can't I just stay home today?"

"Because,"  I replied, realizing there would be no trying to reason. "You know what? Go get dressed right now. You are not missing school, I am already late for work, we are not having a discussion about this and you area already late. GO!"

"But."

"GO!"

"But."

"GO!!"