Friday, June 08, 2012

Slap - what actually happened

Well. It didn't go exactly as I had written it. I tried to slap him. I wanted to slap him really hard across the face and really shock him. I ended up barely grazing his cheek with my fingers. I think the shock value was enough. I got his attention anyway.
I said the first part, and most of the second part about how he can't walk all over me and expect me to take it... but lost my train of thought after that. I ended up telling him something like how my love for him is a burden to me these days instead of a joy. I told him no matter how cool he thinks he is and how many friends he has that what he is doing is wrong. At one point he started to walk away but I told him not to walk away from me. He was mad and very defensive in his posture. I hope the message was received.
I asked him later if he was going to offer any apology to me or to his dad and all he said was, "well I was." I told him I'd be ready to listen when he was ready to put an appropriate apology into words.

Ugh. This kid. He is truly breaking my heart. Just when I think I am all cried out and have reluctantly accepted the inevitable. He manages to step all over my heart again. Again. And? Again.
He turns 17 in 3 weeks. I only have a year left to convince him to get on a better path.